metaphorical moment
This morning I made the decision to take a cat to the animal shelter. It wasn't easy because I don't like to give up on animals. This little one showed up under my garage a few weeks ago. Poor thing was skinny and hungry. It was timid and not very socialble. I kept it in my bathroom, where it just made a mess of things. It did start to put on weight though, and every time I went in, I'd spend some time talking to it calmly, petting it when it let me, trying to gain its trust by being as non-threatening as possible. It finally started purring when petted, although it still did not like to be picked up. However, its presence here was very disruptive. I had to keep the bathroom door closed, which locked in my other cat. The room was a constant mess that I just didn't have time to clean up every day. My hope is that it will get adopted out at the shelter to someone who has more time than I do.
This morning, before I left, I talked to Dan about some of the students in his class. We talked about people who didn't know how to be self-motivated, who didn't seem to have the ability to look around, see what needed to be done, and do it. They seem to want you to tell them everything that needs to be done without taking the responsibility to figure it out themselves. That's one of my personal pet peeves. I'll go to the ends of the earth to help for those who are sincerely trying to help themselves, but those who expect you to spoon-feed it to them bother me. What can you do to help people become more self-motivated, we wondered? Take baby steps and then wean them off the support?
As often happens, especially recently, two apparently unrelated events come together to form an insight. Today I felt like I tossed aside that cat simply because I didn't have the time and energy to invest into it. I did rescue it to a point, but when it became obvious that the investment of time was more than I had available, I turned it in with the hopes that someone else would pick up the problem and help out the animal. I was able to draw a boundary on my time and resources. Is it the same with people? How do you know when to invest the time, and for how long, and how do you know when it's time to pull out even if you see some small signs of progress. Are there students that just take up too many resources? And what to do if I do decide it's time to pull back? Who do I hand them off to so that I can at least hope they will be taken care of?
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